My foray into motherhood has been eye-opening to say the
least. It’s an occupation that doesn’t
come with an instruction manual, all of your training is on-the-job and you’re
taking your cues from a tiny person who shits their pants. With these rules in play, I’m going to assume
that no mother on the planet really knows what she is doing and those that do
are only pretending. That’s right, in the realm of parenting we are all on an
equal playing field. You. Me. Even Snooki.
So when I read an article about Jessica Simpson facing some backlash because she publicly released pictures of
her four-month-old daughter in a two-piece bikini I was yo-yoing between my
heart breaking for her and wanting to pummel the righteous retard who thought a
knit bikini on an infant was “sexualization.”
What kind of name is Claude anyway? I bet your parents are related.
I like to think that we are all just trying to do good by
our children and while I’m not so naïve to think that there aren’t monsters out
there (hello, I’ve seen Toddlers In Tiaras) I hardly doubt that J. Simp is one
of them. The only person “compromising
the sanctity of [baby Maxwell’s] early years” is the British idiot who felt it
necessary to make her a media pawn in their own prudish agenda. Take this as
your cue to go back to being irrelevant.
Good day.
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